A Child Who Questions, A Child Who Grows: The Power of a Parent’s Words
This article is a reflection based on insights from the book 부모의 질문력(The Power of Parental Questions). It explores how meaningful questions from parents can shape a child’s ability to think, learn, and grow.
A child’s learning is not just about memorizing facts. True learning isn’t about being given the answers, but about being guided to discover them. We often judge learning success by what a child can recall. But what matters more is how they view the world, and how often they ask, “Why?” In essence, learning expands thinking, and that expansion begins with questions.
Stimulating a child’s thinking doesn’t require special techniques. Even in daily life, we can begin right away. First, there are no “small” questions. Simple curiosities like, “Why does it rain?” or “Why do cats nap so often?” open doors to deeper understanding. Every object and experience is an opportunity for discovery.
Second, questions without fixed answers are especially powerful. “Why does time pass if we can’t see it?” A question like this engages both imagination and logic. It’s not about getting the right answer. It’s about encouraging children to express their thoughts in their own words. Even if their answers seem illogical, respecting their process helps them gain confidence.
Third, ask questions about everyday objects and situations. A signboard, a spoon, or a swing at the park can all become starting points. “Why is that sign blue?” or “What would a spoon say if it could talk?” These questions bring life to the ordinary and nurture creativity. They’re more than play—they’re tools for building critical thinking.
Love also plays a key role in learning. When a child loves something, curiosity naturally follows. Questions like, “Why do you like this?” or “What do you find interesting about it?” help connect emotions to thoughts. It’s essential to listen without judging, and to match your tone to the child’s level.
When talking with children, keep three principles in mind. First, avoid jumping to conclusions. Instead of saying, “That’s wrong,” ask, “What made you think that?” Second, add imagination to your questions. “If you had an invisibility cloak, where would you go?” stimulates creative thinking. Third, include hope in your questions. “What are you most excited about tomorrow?” can light up their day.
Questions also help children understand themselves. “What have you worked hard on lately?” or “What did you keep trying, even when it was hard?” These questions link effort with identity. Focusing on process—not just results—builds self-worth.
Deep learning comes from a child’s attitude. Education isn’t a race. It’s a journey, one step at a time. Questions like, “Why was this hard for me?” or “What could I try differently next time?” help transform failure into growth.
Expression is a key learning tool too. Many kids today use shorthand slang like “slaps,” “fire,” or “so good” to describe emotions. But those phrases can oversimplify rich experiences. Instead of just saying, “It was good,” encourage children to describe the flavor of ramen as, “The broth was deep and the noodles chewy—it made me happy.” This not only enriches vocabulary but helps children tune into their emotions.
In the end, the topic a child studies is less important than the attitude they bring to learning. Whether it’s music or math, what shapes them is how they feel about the subject—and themselves. Thoughtful questions shape that mindset. Parents who ask questions illuminate their child’s strengths and help them explore who they are. The more thoughtful the questions, the more expansive a child’s world becomes.
So—what kind of question did you ask your child today?
And what question have you asked yourself?
Leave your question in the comments. A single line of curiosity might just spark someone else’s thinking tomorrow.